Today is my baby Ella’s first birthday and it is allllllll I can think about. I expected to feel emotional but I didn’t expect to be overflowing with happiness and sadness all day, switching between the two without warning or reason. I’m excited Ella is learning and experiencing new things but she won’t be my baby for much longer. She is so loved but she won’t remember everyone singing to her and taking turns helping her walk. She’s growing up and nothing will be the same. This is my first child so the only type of motherhood I’ve experienced is this very involved kind. Ella needs me for everything; less things than when she was first born but still, she can’t do much without me. She’s consumed my life and the thought of it being un-consumed is normally why the pendulum in my mind swings from one extreme to the other. But mostly this weekend, I have felt so, so lucky. Lucky to have a family that would drive literally hundreds of miles to support me and celebrate her. Lucky to have sisters who have been listening to me talk about her party for months without telling me I’m ridiculous (at least, not telling me often). Lucky to have friends who have watched me find my motherhood footing (if it can ever really be found) and know what this day means to me. Lucky to have a husband who has let me take the lead. And finally, lucky to have this little angel babe. For many reasons, for any and every reason you can think of. Today is the anniversary of becoming a mother. Today is my Ella’s birthday. This series of posts is called Sunday Best and what could possibly be better than that?
Happy Birthday, Baby Girl