There are so many tragedies in this world. The violence in Paris yesterday is another on a long list; you’d think we would be able to make sense of them by now. But it’s good that we can’t. This should never seem normal, this should never be okay with us, this should never ever make sense.

I’ve written a lot about our trip to Paris. How awe-inspiring and old and beautiful it was. I wish I could adequately describe how being there made me feel. The connection I felt to places I’d never been before but somehow already loved. I felt surrounded by history and art and culture; Paris was a living, breathing humanities seminar. I was scared so much of the time–of the trains and the language and even the people. Scared of being in the way, of being so obviously American and inexperienced. But I left feeling braver. We’d done it; we’d traveled abroad together and triumphed over our fears to make wonderful memories. Bravery- Paris, you gave it to me.

There is so much ugliness in this world. Even in a place as beautiful as Paris. I’m grateful we had the chance to go before it was touched by this violence. But if we ever go again, I know we’ll find a stronger, more resilient, just as beautiful Paris. For now, here is how I’ll remember La Ville Lumière: