Today is my birthday!
Well today is my birthday, period. That’s more accurate.
I know I can’t be the only one who has mixed feelings about birthdays. I love special occasions, even more so since having kids, but I have a hard time when that special occasion is, well, me. It’s never October 16th and today it is. And of course, this year my birthday is sandwiched between Ella’s birthday and her party so it doesn’t seem all that important but I did want to take some time to reflect and to look forward.
This past year was difficult but I don’t think a single trial was in vain. I grew and learned from each and every one. I’m still figuring my way out of some but I do feel like I’m a better person, wife, and mother. I am actually one year older and wiser too and that isn’t always a given.
Even though I had difficult experiences, I can’t say it was a bad year. Ella and Jack are growing up and becoming closer friends, we’ve spent more time with family which is a priceless gift, and we had so many new experiences. And most importantly, I know more than I ever did before that I have such a blessed partnership with Matthew.
Looking forward, I hope to continue to grow and learn. I have goals outside of being a good mom and that feels good and empowering. Ella, Jack, and Matthew have been the whole universe and they still are, but building this blog into something more is like a tiny corner of that universe has finally been carved out just for me. I’m starting to have a blessed partnership with myself. I also want to feel closer to God this year. I’ve been drifting away for too long but I’ve got ahold of my anchor now. And maybe that will help me figure my way out of a few of those trials I mentioned before.
Birthdays are this mix of weird and wonderful and sometimes it’s equal and other times, one side definitely tips the scale. I have high hopes today will be wonderful. Not because anything major will happen but because I am filled with gratitude. For my life, my family, for everything that’s on the horizon. It’s another year down but things are looking way, way up.